How to Feed a Baby

You know, I'm beginning to wonder when breastfeeding became such a public forum of discussion. Why everyone seems to think they have the right to know how I'm feeding my children. I've thought long and hard about this--finally figured I needed to vent. Granted, it's a bit personal--but if everyone seems to think it's okay to ask about such a personal matter--then I'd rather settle things once and for all. I've been trying to figure out if people ask because they're wondering how it goes with twins, or they're simply really too nosey?

My milk never came in. There--I said it. We can sum it up to a million different possibilities as to why, but it simply just isn't there. The few people that have asked, and I light-heartedly try to tell them. . .well, some simply act mortified that I wouldn't do everything I could do to continue giving them my milk. People--it wasn't a choice! I tried every remedy I could, natural and pharmaceutical, and I couldn't produce enough to feed even one. The heartbreak I felt going through this was intense and very agonizing. But then I had to snap out of it and make some smart decisions, because two babies were going to need a strong, competent mom, and they weren't going to wait for me to dilly-dally. I couldn't mope about because things didn't go as I had planned. And especially with twins--there's no time for moping!

So, I made a choice. Yes, I'm using formula. But no, it doesn't mean I'm less of a person. I thought for a while it did, but then I see how well the kiddos are growing, and how lucky I am that they're healthy. And they love me for just taking care of them. That's what counts!

When our parents or even grandparents were having babies, it was often considered taboo to breastfeed. A woman was abnormal for wanting to try. Some women even took shots to make their milk dry up faster. So, now that things have changed, gals in our era act like the world is ending if you can't feed your baby. I was one of them. Not only do I have a newfound sympathy for other mothers who go through this, but need to tell other people to think twice before you ask. Is it really your business? If a mom tells you no, or that she had problems, are you prepared to still be positive in return? And please--don't try to compare your breastfeeding stories to bottle feeding. No one wants to hear it, trust me. Just a word to the wise.

And let me tell you, I have an amazing husband. As we're not entirely reliant on me now for feeding, he gets up every night with one child (usually Grace--she's enamored with him) and feeds and nurtures them. The twins are having an unusually early opportunity to bond with their dad, for which I am grateful. Also grateful for the added moments of sleep this has allowed me.